appropriate

what constitutes the difference between appropriation and plagiarism?

what is: appropriate?

firstly band photos and album covers.

the original:

parallel lines by blondie (wow there are a shitload of people in blondie. all the guys always blend into three or so in my head, they all look the same)

the copies:

garbage (what seedy disgusting bald men)...

and a frightful cross dressing blur

(alex james and graham coxon on the left actually make my life worth living)

everytime i walked into jb hi-fi the other summer, i felt like i was at the optometrist:

eminem

Vs. james blunt

next up: abbey road by the beatles, which has actually been redone so many times, not even chuck norris could count the remakes

sesame street

the simpsons

pocoyo (cuuute)

let it be by the beatles. everyone has a shirt of this from ses. i have two.

fuck the beatles are awesome.

blur (serial copiers)

cartoon

old

hot

dirty (well the top two anyway. graham in the bottom right looks like an absolute angel. fuck i would tap that.)

gorillaz (i see a common factor here. blur/gorillaz = damon albarn. maybe it's just the mind of damon albarn that has to copy.)

the original: joan jett (she sure does love rock 'n' roll...urgh...filth)

the copy: vince noir (that booshing douche)

susan boyle dreaming

hurley, by weezer, rocking out

justin bieber kind of looks like a fag

and wolfmother's new album kind of looks like a vag (DA BIIIIG DOUBLE-U)

i would move into the sound of the music as well as the pictures. but that can wait until another day cos i would actually orgasm at the fun-ness and amount of music analysis.

tom

a tom makes all the difference.

i'm not talking green power ranger tommy tom.

i mean drum tom.

this year/last year there was a sudden surge of toms being played by non-drummers in bands. just to look "cool".

the first i saw of it was the ting tings. although there were probs many more before that in this current surge of it. and the chick from ting tings did the bass drum/tom drumming thing cos she had nothing to do, she only sung and at the beginning was learning guitar.

tom + sailor shirt = win

how do i measure success? if you get on yo gabba gabba, you've made it.

ever since emiliana torrini did that jungle drum song with a simile in the hookline ("my heart is beating like a jungle drum"), she got played on video hits and all these young new teeny boppers ruined her concert for the original fans.

tom + the weird tribal beat boxing thing she does = win

why is indie the new trend. do you fuckers even know what indie stands for? independent = not conforming. what you're doing, it's not indie. i will accept hipster as your label. original indie kids now have to leave their pretty florals, long quirky necklaces, high shorts and vintage clothes and resort to tribal/rustic/other outlandish themed things to be indie:

enter grizzly bear. boy and bear. and all the other bears.

i commend myself for finding such great photos of these bands where they are dressed almost exactly the same. check out the one guy in glasses. and the one guy in a flannel shirt. and one guy in a button up blue shirt. schpooky.

last night, i played above the oxford hotel. and all the bands (but mine mwahahaha. the fat lesbian dyke sound lady said we were the best band of the night by far cos we were actually unique. fuck yeah) sounded and looked exactly the same. bearded, collar shirted or sloppy jumpered, rayban wearing, scarved, necklaced, extremey thin men. and high waisted shorts, skirts, vintage stuff on the girls, nothing ever above the knees.

but the sound was the worst. grizzly bear/boy and bear all over again. ethereal choral vocals of long woo's. extreme changes in structure. small percussion like tambourines and shakers. acoustic guitar with youthful bearded man. basically everywhere i turn, it's grizzly bear. but they all used the damn toms. like it's super fun. sure. i play them with my best friend jenna and my sister rainbow all the time. but if every single fucking band has a tom break down in every fucking song just cos it's the fad right now, fucking leave man. we already have the bears. i want some variety. gimme some trumpets. fuck they are awesome.

tom + the other five bands from last night = fail

percussion gun by the white rabbits. one deceptively simple drumbeat on the tom repeated over and over. so effective. radiohead like chords and singing. video clip is pretty cool. it's all spinny and lighty. so fun to try and play this beat. and it's like. two people on one tom. mindfuck.

tom + mindfuck + spinning = win

lost valentinos also have an awesome song/video clip. serio. they play toms all over like the hills and the forest and in a lake. it's fair epic. and they have like coloured dust, glitter (and wet stuff like water and paint i'm pretty sure) on the toms. so when they hit it, they fly everywhere. it's so cool. and the camera is on like super macro so you see everything. it's like looking at matt muir's eyes: "it was like the first time i heard the beatles". they even have super awesome nice photos of the making of it.

tom + flying craft = win

i love love love love love vampire weekend. seriously, they are sooo good. and a-punk was the first song i heard/saw of theirs. it's so awesome. one take. shitload of different shit (what's with the epic superbad quoting today) happening in each frame. their clothes change, crafty stuff also happens in an under the sea type sequence. but the coolest thing is the choreographed tom playing. two guys, two toms, benny hill type fast movements. so good.

tom + choreographed benny hill = win

i love toms in songs. but the overkill of pretentious fuckers trying to copy with nothing new and original to add at the moment are like *shoots self in head*

oh look, a hot sailor

remember this: make a wish tom, make a wish

i scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream

fairy floss = the most delicious thing ever.

oh and ice cream is pretty good too.

there are so many kinds. you got your ice blocks. tubs of ice cream. gelato. ice cream on a stick. chocolate coated. bubble gum inserted. golden gaytime? pretty much everything is there.

my favourite ice block? lime flavoured ones. sugary green goodness. they are closely followed by those lemonade ones. yum. schweppes is particularly good. i have fond memories of getting one of those ice blocks every time my family went to hornsby pool.

here i am eating a green ice block. notice how happy i am. below, you can see my best friend jenna and i posing as lesbians. why? i am wearing purple leg warmers and eating a green ice block. purple + green = lesbians. not really though. that would be sick. why? cos you don't screw the crew. jenna being very much so a part of my crew.

why ice cream?

cos this afternoon when i walked home, i was excited when i saw the home ice cream truck. my happiness was shattered when i saw the indian man inside the truck. no i'm not that racist. but this indian guy is seriously the most annoying person on earth. he insists on ringing the bell non-stop at about 247 dings per minute. and NO ONE on my street gets it cos they are all 80+. except for me sometimes. today was not one of those days.

reward the indian man for waking up my whole neighbourhood at 3pm during their afternoon catnaps?

no siree.

tired. stressed.

you'll feel better on swisse. (yeah i watch huey's cooking adventures. what of it?)

(yeah i know it's for prostate. i did it on purpose. i knew you would enjoy it)

there are currently nine people living in my house.

all asian extended family.

hello discomfort.

waking up with "strangers" near your face.

can't get changed without having someone see you.

can't go to the bathroom without waiting for at least another hour.

can't go on the computer without two+ people standing behind you snooping about.

seriously...GO AWAY!

i just want like five minutes....actually like.....lots of five minutes....put together.

oh dear lord. i really take my space for granted. and now that it's gone....i just want nothing more than to have like 2m by 2m of "me" area.

seriously, i am getting squashed like this baby right here:

so anyway yeah. trying to escape snoopy people is making me tired and stressed. but i refuse to take swisse.

o romeo, romeo, wherefore art thou romeo?

i have realised something just now.

romeo and juliet is the most ridiculous play i have ever read.

if i were to like a guy, and this guy liked me, i would not be standing at my balcony wondering where he was...out loud. worse yet, if i did do this, and he appeared out of nowhere and asked me to marry him, i would not say yes. especially not the day after. and afterwards i would probably stay away from him.

apparently, the good man william shakespeare intended for romeo and juliet to be around 14 years old (heaven forbid). at 14, romeo loses rosaline. he sees juliet. they "fall in love". they get married. they kill themselves. at 14. that is sick. they are clearly just insane out of their brains.

and they all just kill each other. tybalt. mercutio. and of course romeo and juliet. it's not even revenge tragedy. it's not a love story. to me it's just a sick tragedy. that is overdone and unbelievable. the storyline, i'm talking about. entertainment value would only come from humour.

i will admit the film version with claire danes and leonardo di caprio is entertaining though.

claire danes is hot and dtf, down to fuck, one.

two, when "da boys" are riding in their car playing doof doof music the lyrics are "da boys, da boys" with a true ganga wog accent. it's classic.

three, mercutio is black and provides the best part of the movie when he taunts "row-may-o".

leonardo di caprio is frickin hilarious when he's crying, yelling "juliet" and "then i defy you, stars". all squinty and topless with no package to offer, no washboard for the laundry, no grater for the cheese, no sandpaper for jesus (yes, he was a carpenter).

hey look, a japanese version that is based (very loosely) on the story of romeo and juliet. go asia.

but overall, it's a ridiculous storyline and i can not empathise or sympathise with them arty fartys that looooooove it...i'll love you in a minute (not really).

music theory

doing the theory for music exams may well be one of the most torturous and blandest tasks you could ever have to do. like chewing sawdust.

sure i am very interested in music, all the history, styles and techniques. but when you have a massive load of it to do, it is...quite frankly...death. think of all the frickin repertoire. now for every piece, you have to go through and find, learn and memorise all the theory.

you could say

i can't handle handel.

i don't want you bach. (but i do want michael jackson back)

i wanna play miriam hyde and seek but without the seek.

i say you should telemann to go already.

and all for a piece of paper with different grades of music qualifications...

exams...end!

sweet tooth...

today i saw the most repulsive/ infuriating/ perplexing thing on the train.

a balding man in his late 30's boards the train armed with a suitcase and two green enviro bags chock a block full of sweets. he sits opposite me, taking off his black trenchcoat to reveal a red flannel shirt. "that's ok"...i thought..."perhaps he has children and is planning a party for them"...

he puts down his black umbrella and stretches to reveal his black fanny pack around his overflowing waist (no doubt filled with candy too). with a sigh, he has finally settled and proceeds to forage through his treasures. "oh dear"...."i was wrong"

he pulls out a 1.25L bottle of coke. sculls it down in less than a minute and drops it on the floor. *crush crush crush* thirteen stomps later, i realised why he is wearing sturdy black wellington boots. he makes a small crevice in one of the green enviro bags and shoves the flattened plastic in. bottle after bottle, he repeats the process. my ears suffered the most agonising sound they have ever heard. he must've finished five by my count.

but no, he is not done yet. he stretches once more, pushing his hands down his pants. "wtf"...i hesitate..."oh please god no"

thankfully i am relieved. he is only pulling out three more bags of candy. one bag of snakes. one bag of gummi bears. and a mixed bag of fruit chews. he snacks, nay feasts, on these.

alas, it is my stop. i get off, peeking into his other enviro bag and suitcase. "more candy....more fizzy drinks...enough to feed fifty five year olds for several months"

it is beyond me how he could consume that amount of sugar in half an hour, or how he could drink so much sugary liquid and not need the bathroom. and who knows how much he had consumed before and after i had seen him.

one thing is for sure though, i am equally disgusted as i am amused and fascinated.

jane is such a pain

again, i have to suffer the boring words of jane austen; the next installment being pride and prejudice.

ok i understand, she is skillful. her novels are well thought out. coming of age, developing kind characteristics, dissolving class distinctions, etc ,etc. however, has one stopped to think when they were entertained by emma at all? besides the rare moments when miss bates won't shut up, which are actually quite annoying, nothing jane austen does seems to please me.

it's tedious writing. annoying like a pretentious arty farty who just won't fuck off.

there is a particular girl i see around all the time. she will do anything to fit in with the label of "indie". i don't think she understands that by aiming to be "indie" she is becoming precisely the opposite. not independent but a sheep. baaaaaa.

but back to my original point.

jane. you are a pain.

you make me feel a la: